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oshothe vigyana bhairava tantra vol one | ||
the book of the secrets : a new commentary : talks given from 01/10/1972 pm to 01/03/1973 pm | ||
the vigyana bhairava tantra vol one chapter seventeen | ||
several stop techniques 09 december 1972 pm in woodlands bombay | ||
JUST AS YOU HAVE THE IMPULSE TO DO
SOMETHING, STOP. WHEN SOME DESIRE
COMES, CONSIDER IT. THEN, SUDDENLY, QUIT IT. ROAM ABOUT UNTIL
EXHAUSTED AND THEN, DROPPING TO THE GROUND, IN THIS DROPPING BE WHOLE. Life has two
balances: one is of being and the other of doing. Your being is your nature. It is with
you always; you have not to do anything to get it. It is already the case, you are it. It
is not that you possess it, not even that a distance exists between you and it -- you are
it. You are your being. Doing is an achievement. Whatsoever you do is not already the
case. If you do it, it will happen; if you do not do it, it will not happen. All that is
not already the case is not your being. To exist, to
survive, you have to do much. And then, by and by, your activity becomes a barrier to
knowing your being. Your activity is your circumference -- you live on it, you cannot live
without it. But it is only the circumference; it is not you, it is not the center.
Whatsoever you have is the achievement of your doing; having is the result of doing. But
the center is surrounded, engulfed by your doing and your having. The first thing to
note before we proceed into these techniques is that whatsoever you have is not your
being, and whatsoever you do or can do is not your being. Your being precedes all doing.
Your being precedes all your possessions, all your having. But the mind is constantly
involved in doing and having. Beyond mind or below mind exists your being. How to
penetrate into that center is what religions have been seeking. This is what has always
been the search of all those who are interested in knowing the basic reality of human
existence, the ultimate core, the substance of your being. Unless you understand this
division between the circumference and the center, you will not be able to understand
these sutras which we are going to discuss. So note the
distinction. Whatsoever you have -- money, knowledge, prestige, whatsoever you have -- it
is not you. You have them, they are your possessions; you are different from them.
Secondly, whatsoever you do is not your being. You may do it or you may not do it. For
example, you laugh, but you may laugh or you may not laugh. You run, but you may run or
you may not run. But you are and there is no choice. You cannot choose your being. You are
already there. Action is a choice.
You may choose, you may not choose. You may do "this," you may not do
"this." You may become a saint or you may become a thief, but your sainthood and
your thiefhood are both doings. You can choose, you can change. A saint can become a thief
and a thief can become a saint. But that is not your being: your being precedes your
sainthood, your thiefhood. Whenever you have
to do something, you have to be there already; otherwise you cannot do it. Who runs? Who
laughs? Who steals? Who becomes a saint? The being must precede all activity. The activity
can be chosen, but being cannot be chosen. The being is the chooser, not the chosen, and
you cannot choose the chooser -- he is already there. You cannot do anything about him.
Remember this: having, doing, are with you just as a circumference is with the center, but
you are the center. This center is the
self, or you may call it the ATMAN or whatsoever name you like. This center is your
innermost point. How to reach it? And unless one reaches it, knows it, unless one realizes
it, one cannot reach to a blissful state which is eternal, one cannot know the deathless,
one cannot know the divine. Unless one realizes this center, one will remain in misery,
anguish and suffering. The circumference is the hell. These techniques are the means to
enter into this center. The first
technique: JUST AS YOU HAVE THE IMPULSE TO
DO SOMETHING, STOP. All these
techniques are concerned with stopping in the middle. George Gurdjieff made these
techniques very well-known in the West, but he was not aware of VIGYANA BHAIRAVA TANTRA.
He learned these techniques in Tibet from Buddhist lamas. He worked on these techniques in
the West, and many, many seekers came to realize the center through these techniques. He
called them stop exercises, but the source of these exercises is VIGYANA BHAIRAVA TANTRA. Buddhists learned
from VIGYANA BHAIRAVA. Sufis also have such exercises; they are also borrowed from VIGYANA
BHAIRAVA. Basically, this is the source book of all techniques which are known all over
the world. Gurdjieff used it
in a very simple way. For example, he would tell his students to dance. A group would be
dancing -- a group of, say, twenty people would be dancing -- and suddenly he would say,
"Stop!" And the moment Gurdjieff would say stop, they would have to stop
totally. Wherever the pause would fall, they would have to stop then and there. No change
could be made, no adjustment could be made. If one of your feet was above the earth and
you were just standing on one foot, you would have to remain that way. If you fell, that
was another thing, but you were not to cooperate with the fall. If your eyes were opened,
they had to remain opened. Now you could not close them. If they closed by themselves,
that was another thing. But as far as you were concerned, consciously you had stopped, you
had become just like a stone statue. Miracles happened
because in activity, in dance, in movement, when suddenly you stop, a gap happens. This
sudden stoppage of all activity divides you into two: your body and you. Your body and you
were in movement. Suddenly you stop. The body has the tendency to move. It was in
movement, so there is momentum; you were dancing, and there is momentum. The body is not
ready for this sudden stop. Suddenly you feel that the body has the impulse to do
something, but you have stopped. A gap comes into existence. You feel your body as
something distant, far away, with the impulse to move, with momentum for activity. And
because you have stopped and you are not cooperating with the body and its activity and
its impulse, its momentum, you become separate from it. But you can deceive
yourself. A slight cooperation and the gap will not happen. For example, you feel
uncomfortable, but the teacher has said, "Stop!" You have heard the word, but
still you make yourself comfortable and then you stop. Then nothing will happen. Then you
have deceived yourself, not the teacher, because you missed the point. The whole point of
the technique is missed. Suddenly, when you hear the word "Stop!" instantly you
have to stop, not doing anything. Perhaps the posture
was inconvenient, you were afraid you might fall down, you might break a bone. But
whatsoever happens, now it is not your concern. If you have any concern, you will deceive
yourself. This suddenly becoming dead creates a gap. The stopping is at the body and the
stopper is the center; the circumference and the center are separate. In that sudden
stopping you can feel yourself for the first time; you can feel the center. Gurdjieff used
this technique to help many. This technique has
many dimensions; it can be used in many ways. But first try to understand the mechanism.
The mechanism is simple. You are in activity, and when you are in activity you forget
yourself completely; the activity becomes the center of your attention. Someone has died,
and you are weeping and crying, and tears are falling down. You have forgotten yourself
completely. The one who has died has become the center, and around that center this
activity is happening -- your weeping, your crying, your sadness, your tears. If I
suddenly say to you, "Stop!" and you stop yourself completely, you will be
totally taken away from your body and the realm of activity. Whenever you are in activity,
you are in it, deeply absorbed in it. Sudden stoppage throws you off balance; it throws
you out of activity. This being thrown leads you to the center. Ordinarily, what
are we doing? From one activity we move to another. We go on from one activity to another,
from A to B and from B to C. In the morning, the moment you are awake activity has
started. Now you will be active the whole day. You will change to many activities, but you
will not be inactive for a single moment. How to be inactive? It is difficult. And if you
try to be inactive, your effort to be inactive will become an activity. There are many who
are trying to be inactive. They sit in a Buddha posture and they try to be inactive. But
how can you try to be inactive? The very effort is again an activity. So you can convert
inactivity also into activity. You can force yourself to be quiet, still, but that forcing
is an activity of the mind. That is why so many try to go into meditation but never reach
anywhere -- because their meditation is again an activity. They can change... If you were
singing an ordinary song, you can now change to a BHAJAN, to a devotional song. You can
sing slow now, but both are activities. You are running, you are walking, you are reading
-- these are activities. You can pray -- that too is an activity. You move from one
activity to another. And with the last
thing in the night, when you are falling into sleep, you are still active; the activity
has not stopped. That is why dreams happen, because the activity goes on. You have fallen
asleep, but the activity continues. In the subconscious you are still active -- doing
things, possessing things, losing things, moving. Dreaming means you have fallen asleep
because of exertion, but the activity is still there continuously. Only sometimes, for
a few moments -- and these have become more and more rare for the modern man -- only for a
few moments dreaming stops and you are totally asleep. But then that inactivity is
unconscious. You are not conscious, you are fast asleep. The activity has ceased; now
there is no circumference, now you are at the center -- but totally exhausted, totally
dead, unconscious. That is why Hindus
have always been saying that SUSHUPTI -- dreamless sleep -- and SAMADHI -- the ultimate
ecstasy -- are similar, the same, with only one difference. But the difference is great:
the difference is of awareness. In sushupti, in dreamless sleep, you are at the center of
your being -- but unaware. In samadhi, in the ultimate ecstasy, in the ultimate state of
meditation, also you are at the center -- but aware. That is the difference, but it is a
great difference, because if you are unaware, even if you are at the center it is
meaningless. It refreshes you, it makes you more alive again, it gives you vitality -- in
the morning you feel fresh and blissful -- but if you are unaware, even if you are at the
center your life remains the same. In samadhi you
enter yourself fully conscious, fully alert. And once you are at the center fully alert,
you will never be the same again. Now you will know who you are. Now you will know that
your possessions, your actions are just on the periphery; they are just the ripples, not
your nature. The mechanism of
these techniques of stopping is to throw you suddenly into inactivity. The point must come
suddenly, because if you try to be inactive you will turn it into activity. So do not try,
and suddenly be inactive. That is the meaning of "Stop!" You are running and I
say, "Stop!" Do not try, just stop! If you try, you will miss the point. For
example, you are sitting here. If I say stop, then stop immediately then and there; not a
single moment is to be missed. If you try and adjust, and you settle down and then say,
"Okay, now I will stop," you have missed the point. SUDDENLY is the base, so do
not make any effort to stop -- just stop! You can try it
anywhere. You are taking your bath -- suddenly order yourself to "Stop!" and
stop. Even if it is only for a single moment, you will feel a different phenomenon
happening within you. You are thrown to the center and suddenly everything stops -- not
only the body. When the body stops totally, your mind stops also. When you say,
"Stop!" do not breathe then. Let everything stop... no breathing, no body
movement. For a single moment remain in this stop, and you will feel you have penetrated
suddenly, at rocket speed, to the center. And even a glimpse is miraculous, revolutionary.
It changes you, and by and by you can have more clear glimpses of the center. That is why
inactivity is not to be practiced. Use it suddenly, when you are unaware. So a master can be
helpful. This is a group method. Gurdjieff used it as a group method because if you say
"Stop!" you can deceive yourself easily. First you make yourself comfortable and
then you say "Stop!" Or even if consciously you have not made any preparation
for it, unconsciously you may be prepared. Then you may say, "Now I can stop."
If it is done by the mind, if there is a planning behind it, it is useless; then the
technique will not be of any help. So in a group it is good. A master is working with you,
and he says, "Stop!" He will find moments when you are in a very inconvenient
posture, and then a flash happens, a sudden lightning. Activity can be
practiced; inactivity cannot be practiced -- and if you practice it, it becomes just
another activity. You can be inactive only suddenly. Sometimes it happens that you are
driving a car, and suddenly you feel there is going to be an accident, that another car
has reached near yours and in just a moment there will be a crash. Suddenly your mind
stops, breathing stops, everything stops. So many times in such accidents one is thrown to
the center. But you may miss the point even in an accident. I was in a car and
there was an accident, and one of the most beautiful accidents possible. Three persons
were with me, but they missed the whole thing completely. It could have been a revolution
in their lives, but they missed. The car went down into a river bed, into a dry river bed,
from a bridge. The car was totally upside down, and the three persons with me began
crying; they began weeping. One woman was there
and she was crying. She was just beside me and she was crying, "I am dead! I am
dead!" I told her,
"If you were dead, then no one would be here to say this." But she was
trembling, and she said, "I am dead! What will happen to my children?" Even
after we carried her out of the car she was trembling and saying the same thing:
"What will happen to my children? I am dead!" It took at least half an hour for
her to calm down. She missed the
point. It was such a beautiful thing: suddenly she could have stopped everything. And one
couldn't do anything. The car was falling from the bridge, so her activity was not needed
at all. One couldn't do anything. But still the mind can create activity. She started
thinking about her children, and then she began crying, "I am dead!" A subtle
moment was missed. In dangerous situations the mind stops automatically. Why? Because mind
is a mechanism and it can work with only routine things -- that which it has been trained
to do. You cannot train
your mind for accidents, otherwise they would not be called accidents. If you are ready,
if you have passed through rehearsals, then they are not accidents. `Accident' means that
the mind is not ready to do anything. The thing is so sudden, it leaps from the unknown --
mind cannot do anything. It is not ready, it is not trained for it. It is bound to stop
unless you start something else, unless you start something for which you are trained. This woman who was
crying about her children was not at all attentive to what was happening. She was not even
aware that she was alive. The present moment was not in her focus of consciousness. She
had moved away from the situation to her children, to death and to other things. She had
escaped. As far as her attention was concerned, she had escaped from the situation
completely. But as far as the
situation was concerned, nothing could be done; one could only be aware. Whatsoever was
happening was happening. One could only be aware. As far as the present moment is
concerned, in an accident what can you do? It is already beyond you, and the mind is not
prepared for it. The mind cannot function, so the mind stops. That is why dangers
have a secret appeal, an intrinsic appeal: they are meditative moments. If you race a car
and it goes beyond ninety miles per hour, and then beyond one hundred and then beyond one
hundred and ten and beyond one hundred and twenty, then a situation comes in which
anything can happen and you will not be able to do anything. Now really, the car is beyond
control, going beyond control. Suddenly the mind cannot function; it is not ready for it.
That is the thrill of speed -- because a silence creeps in, you are thrown to the center. These techniques help you to move to the center without any accidents, without any danger. But remember, you cannot practice them. When I say you cannot practice them, what do I mean? In a way you can practice them: suddenly you can stop. But the stopping must be sudden, you must not be prepared for it. You should not think about it and plan it and say that "At twelve o'clock I will stop." Let the unknown happen to you when you are unprepared. Move in the unknown, the uncharted, without any knowledge. This is one technique: JUST AS YOU HAVE THE IMPULSE TO DO SOMETHING, STOP. This is one
dimension. For example, you
have the impulse to sneeze. You are feeling that the impulse is coming, you are feeling
the sneeze coming. Now a moment comes when you cannot do anything -- it will happen. But
in the very beginning of the feeling, when you feel the sensation of a sneeze coming to
you, the moment you become aware, stop! What can you do? Can you stop the sneeze? If you
try to stop the sneeze, the sneeze will come sooner, because stopping will make your mind
more conscious about it and you will feel the sensation more. You will become more
sensitive, your total attention will be there, and that attention will help the sneeze to
come out sooner. It will become unbearable. You cannot stop the sneeze directly, but you
can stop yourself. What can you do?
You feel the sensation that the sneeze is coming: stop! Do not try to stop the sneeze,
just you yourself stop. Do not do anything. Remain completely unmoving, with not even your
breath going in or coming out. For a moment, stop, and you will feel that the impulse has
gone back, that it has dropped. And in this dropping of the impulse a subtle energy is
released which is used in going toward the center, because in a sneeze you are throwing
some energy out -- in any impulse. `Impulse' means you
are burdened with some energy which you cannot use and cannot absorb. It wants to move
out, it wants to be thrown out; you want a relief. That is why after you sneeze you will
feel good, a subtle well-being. Nothing has happened, you have simply released some energy
which was superfluous, a burden. Now it is no more there; you are relieved of it. Then you
feel a subtle relaxation inside. That is why
physiologists, Pavlov, B. F. Skinner and others, say sex is also like sneezing. They say
physiologically there is no difference, sex is just like sneezing. You are overburdened
with energy; you want to throw it out. Once it is thrown out your mechanism relaxes, you
become unburdened. Then you feel good. That good feeling is just a release, according to
physiologists, and as far as physiology goes they are right. Whenever you have some
impulse, JUST AS YOU HAVE THE IMPULSE TO DO SOMETHING, STOP! Not only with a physiological
impulse, any impulse can be used. For example, you
were going to drink a glass of water. You have touched the water, the glass -- suddenly
stop. Let the hand be there, let the desire to drink, the thirst be there inside, but you
stop completely. The glass is outside, the thirst is inside; the hand is on the glass, the
eyes are on the glass -- stop suddenly. No breathing, no movement, as if you have become
dead. The very impulse, the thirst, will release energy, and that energy is used for going
to the center. You will be thrown to the center. Why? Because any impulse is a movement
outward. Remember, `impulse' means energy moving outward. Remember another
thing: energy is always in movement -- either going out or coming in. Energy can never be
static. These are the laws. If you understand the laws, then the mechanism of the
technique will be easy. Energy is always in movement. Either it is moving out or moving
in; energy can never be static. If it is static it is not energy, and there is nothing
which is not energy, so everything is moving somewhere. When an impulse,
any impulse, comes to you, it means energy is moving out. That is why your hand goes to
the glass -- you have moved out. A desire has come to do something. All activities are
movements toward that which is without from that which is within -- movements from within
to without. When you stop
suddenly, the energy cannot be static in you. You have become static, but the energy
cannot be static in you, and the mechanism through which it was moving out is not dead, it
has stopped. So what can the energy do? The energy cannot do anything other than move
inward. Energy cannot be static. It was going out. You have stopped, the mechanism has
stopped, but the mechanism which can lead it toward the center is there. This energy will
move inward. You are converting
your energy and changing its dimension every moment without knowing it. You are angry, and
you feel to beat someone or to destroy something or to do something violent -- try this.
Take someone -- your friend, your wife, your child, anyone -- and hug, kiss or embrace him
or her. You were angry, you were going to destroy something; you wanted to do some violent
thing. Your mind was destructive; the energy was moving toward violence. Love someone
immediately. In the beginning
you may feel that this is just like acting. You will wonder, "How can I love? How can
I love in this moment? I am angry!" You do not know the mechanism. In this moment you
can love deeply because the energy has been aroused, it has arisen. It has come to a point
where it wants to be expressed, and energy needs movement. If you just start loving
someone, the same energy will move into love and you will feel a rush of energy that you
may not have ever felt. There are persons
who cannot go into love unless they are angry, unless they are violent. There are people
who can only go into deep love when their energy is moving violently. You may not have
observed, but it happens daily: couples will fight before they make love. Wives and
husbands fight, become angry, become violent, and then they make love, and they may not
have understood what was happening. Then it becomes a mechanical habit -- whenever they
fight they will love. And the day they do not fight they will not be able to love. Particularly in
Indian villages, where wives are still beaten, if a certain husband stops beating his wife
it is known that now he has stopped loving her. And even wives understand that if the
husband has become totally nonviolent toward them, it means the love has stopped. He is
not fighting, so it means he is not loving. Why? Why is fight
so associated with love? It is associated because the same energy can move in different
dimensions. You may call it "love" or "hate." They look opposite, but
they are not so opposite, because the same energy is moving. So a person who becomes
incapable of hate becomes incapable of love, according to your definitions of love. A
person who cannot be violently angry becomes incapable of the love which you know. He may
be capable of a different quality of love, but that is not your love. A Buddha loves, but
that love is totally different. That is why Buddha calls it compassion; he never calls it
love. It is more like compassion, less like your love, because your love implies hate,
anger, violence. Energy can move,
can change directions. It can become hate, it can become love -- the same energy. And the
same energy can move inward also, so whenever you have the impulse to do something, Stop!
This is not suppression. You are not suppressing anything, you are just playing with
energy -- just playing with energy and knowing the workings of it, how it works inwardly.
But remember, the impulse must be real and authentic; otherwise nothing will happen. For example, when
there is no thirst you move to a glass of water and then suddenly you stop. Nothing will
happen because there is nothing to happen -- the energy was not moving. You were feeling
love toward your wife, your husband, your friend. You wanted to hug, to kiss -- stop! But
the impulse must be there authentically. If the impulse is not there and you were just
going to console someone, to kiss because the kiss is expected, and then you stop, then
nothing will happen because nothing was moving inside. So first remember,
the impulse must be authentic, real. Only with a real impulse does energy move, and when a
real impulse is suddenly stopped the energy becomes suspended. With no dimension from
where to move out, it turns in. It has to move, it cannot remain there. But we are so false
that nothing seems real. You eat your meal because of the clock, because of the time, not
because of hunger. So if you stop, nothing will happen because there was really no hunger
behind it, no impulse. No energy was moving there. That is why if you take your meal at
one o'clock, at one o'clock you will feel the hunger. But the hunger is false; it is just
a mechanical habit, just a dead habit. Your body is not hungry. If you do not eat you will
feel something is missing, but if you can remain for one hour without eating you will
forget it, the hunger will have subsided. A real hunger will
grow more; it is bound to grow. If your hunger was real, then at two you will feel more
hungry. If the hunger was false, then at two you will have completely forgotten. Really,
there will be no hunger at two. Even if you want to eat, now you will not feel hungry. The
hunger was just a false, mechanical feeling. No energy was moving, it was just the mind
saying to you that now this is the time to eat, so eat. If you are feeling
sleepy, stop! But the feeling must be real; that is the problem. And that is the problem
for us now. It was not so in Shiva's time. When the VIGYANA BHAIRAVA TANTRA was preached
for the first time, it was not so. Man was authentic, humanity was real, pure, nothing was
false about it. With us everything is false. You pretend that you love; you pretend that
you are angry. You go on pretending and then you forget yourself whether you are
pretending or whether anything real is left. You never say what is in you, you never
express it. You go on expressing what is not there. Watch yourself and you will come to
know it. You say something,
but you feel something else. Really, you wanted to say quite the opposite, but if you say
the real thing you will become totally unfit -- because the whole society is false, and in
a false society you can exist only as a false person. The more adjusted, the more false,
because if you want to be real you will feel a maladjustment. That is why
renunciation came into existence, because of a false society. Buddha had to leave not
because it had any positive meaning, but only a negative meaning -- because with a false
society you cannot be real. Or at every moment you are in a constant struggle,
unnecessarily and dissipating energy. So leave the unreal, leave the false, so that you
can be real. That was the basic reason for all renunciation. But watch yourself,
how unreal you are. Watch the double mind. You are saying something, but you are feeling
quite the contrary. Simultaneously, you are saying one thing in your mind and something
else without. Thus, if you stop anything which is not real, the technique will not help.
So find something authentic about yourself and try to stop that. Not everything has become
false, many things are still real. Fortunately, everyone is real sometimes; in some moment
everyone is real. Then stop it. You are feeling
angry, and you feel it is real. You are going to destroy something, beat your child, or do
something: Stop! But do not stop with a consideration. Do not say, "Anger is bad, so
I should stop" -- no ! Do not say, "This is not going to help the child, so I
should stop." No mental consideration is needed, because if you consider, then the
energy has moved into consideration. This is an inner mechanism. If you say, "I
should not beat my child because it is not going to do any good to him, and this is not
good for me also. This is useless and this never helps," the same energy which was
going to become anger has become consideration. Now you have considered the whole thing,
and the energy has subsided. It has moved into consideration, into thinking. Then you
stop, but then there is no energy to move in. When you feel angry, do not consider it, do
not think about it being good or bad; do not think at all. Suddenly remember the technique
and stop! Anger is pure
energy... nothing bad, nothing good. It may become good, it may become bad -- that will
depend on the result, not on the energy. It can become bad if it goes out and destroys
something, if it becomes destructive. It may become a beautiful ecstasy if it moves within
and throws you to the center; it may become a flower. Energy is simply energy -- pure,
innocent, neutral. Do not consider it. You were going to do something -- do not think,
simply stop and then remain stopped. In that remaining you will have a glimpse of the
inner center. You will forget the periphery and the center will come into your vision. Just as you have
the impulse to do something, Stop! Try it. Remember three things... One, try it only when
a real impulse is there. Secondly, do not think about stopping, just stop. And thirdly,
wait! When you have stopped, no breathing, no movement -- wait and see what happens. Do
not try. When I say to wait, I mean do not try now to think about the inner center. Then
you will again miss. Do not think of the self, of the atman. Do not think that now the
glimpse is there, now the glimpse is coming. Do not think, just wait. Let the impulse, the
energy move by itself. If you start thinking about the brahman and the atman and the
center, the energy will have moved into this thinking. You can waste this
inner energy very simply. Just a thought will be enough to give it a direction; then you
will go on thinking. When I say stop, it means stop totally, fully. Nothing is moving, as
if the whole time has stopped. There is no movement -- simply you are! In that simple
existence, suddenly the center explodes. The second
technique: 26 26 WHEN SOME DESIRE COMES,
CONSIDER IT. THEN, SUDDENLY, QUIT IT. This is a different dimension of the same technique. WHEN SOME DESIRE COMES, CONSIDER IT. THEN, SUDDENLY, QUIT IT. You feel a desire
-- a desire for sex, a desire for love, a desire for food, anything. You feel a desire:
consider it. When the sutra says consider it, it means do not think for or against it,
just consider the desire, what it is. A sexual desire
comes to the mind. You say, "This is bad." This is not consideration. You have
been taught that this is bad, so you are not considering this desire, you are consulting
the scriptures, you are consulting the past -- the past teachers, the RISHIS -- sages. You
are not considering the desire itself, you are considering something else. You are
considering many things; your conditioning, your upbringing, your education, your culture,
your civilization, your religion -- but not the desire. This simple desire
has come. Do not bring in the mind, the past, the education, the conditioning; do not
bring in values. Just consider this desire -- what it is. If your mind could be washed
completely of all that has been given to you by the society, of all that your parents have
given to you -- the education, the culture -- if your total mind could be washed out, the
desire for sex will arise. It will arise, because that desire is not given to you by the
society. That desire is biologically built in; it is in you. For example, if a
child is born and no language is taught, the child will not learn any language. He will
remain without language. A language is a social phenomenon; it has to be taught. But when
the right moment comes, the child will feel sexual desire. That is not a social
phenomenon, it is biologically built in. The desire will come at the right mature moment.
It is not social, it is biological -- deeper. It is built into your cells. Because you were
born out of sex, every cell of your body is a sex cell; you consist of sex cells. Unless
your biology can be washed off completely, the desire will be there. It will come -- it is
already there. When a child is born the desire is already there, because the child is a
by-product of a sexual meeting. He comes through sex; his whole body is built with sex
cells. The desire is there, only a time is needed before his body becomes mature enough to
feel that desire, to enact that desire. The desire will be there whether you are taught
that sex is bad or good, whether you are not taught that sex is hell or heaven, whether
you are taught this way or that way, for or against -- because both are teachings. The old traditions,
the old religions, Christianity particularly, they go on preaching against sex. The new
cults of hippies and yippies and others have started the opposite movement. They say sex
is good, sex is ecstatic, sex is the only real thing in the world. Both are teachings. Do
not consider your desire according to some teaching. Just consider the desire in its
purity, as it is -- a fact. Do not interpret it. Consideration here
means not interpreting, but just looking at the fact as it is. The desire is there: look
at it directly, immediately. Do not bring in your thoughts or ideas, because no thought is
yours and no idea is yours. Everything has been given to you, every idea is a borrowed
thing. No thought is original -- no thought can be original. Do not bring in thinking,
just look at the desire, at what it is, as if you do not know anything about it. Face it!
Encounter it! That is what is meant by CONSIDER IT. WHEN SOME DESIRE COMES, CONSIDER IT. Just look at the
fact -- at what it is. Unfortunately, it is one of the most difficult things to do.
Compared to this, reaching to the moon is not so difficult or reaching to the peak of
Everest is not so difficult. It is highly complicated -- reaching to the moon is highly
complicated, infinitely complicated, a very complex phenomenon. But compared to living
with a fact of the inner mind it is nothing, because the mind is so subtly involved in
everything you do. It is always there. Look at the word... If I say, "Sex," the
moment I say it you have decided for or against. The moment I say, "Sex," you
have interpreted: "This is not good. This is bad." Or, "This is good."
You have interpreted even the word. Many persons came
to me when the book FROM SEX TO SUPERCONSCIOUSNESS was published. They came and they said,
"Please change the title. The very word `sex' makes them disturbed -- they have not
read the book. And those who have already read the book also say to change the title. Why? The very word
gives you a certain interpretation. Mind is so interpretive that if I say "Lemon
juice," your saliva starts flowing. You have interpreted the words. In the words
`lemon juice' there is nothing like lemon, but your saliva starts flowing. If I wait for a
few moments, you will become uneasy because you will have to swallow. The mind has
interpreted; it has come in. Even with words you cannot remain aloof, without
interpreting. It will be very difficult, when a desire arises, to remain aloof, to remain
just a dispassionate observer, calm and quiet, looking at the fact, not interpreting it. I say, "This
man is a Mohammedan" The moment I say, "This man is a Mohammedan," the
Hindu has thought that this man is bad. If I say, "This man is a Jew," the
Christian has decided that this man is not good. The very word `Jew', and in the Christian
mind comes the interpretation; the traditional, conventional idea flares up. This Jew is
not to be considered, the old interpretation will have to be imposed on this Jew. Every Jew is a
different Jew. Every Hindu is a different, unique individual. You cannot interpret him
because you know other Hindus. You may have come to conclude that all the Hindus you have
known are bad, but this Hindu is not in your experience. You are interpreting this Hindu
according to your past experience. Do not interpret, interpretation is not consideration.
Consideration means consider THIS fact -- absolutely this fact. Remain with this fact. Rishis have said
that sex is bad. It may have been bad for them; you do not know. You have the desire, a
fresh desire, with you. Consider it, look at it, be attentive to it. THEN, SUDDENLY, QUIT
IT. There are two parts
to this technique. First, remain with the fact -- aware, attentive of what is happening.
When you feel a sexual desire, what is happening in you? See how you become feverish, how
your body begins to tremble, how you feel a sudden madness creeping in, how you feel as if
you are possessed by something else. Feel it, consider it. Do not exercise any judgement,
just move into this fact -- the fact of sexual desire. Do not say it is bad! If you have said
that, the consideration has stopped, you have closed the door. Now your face is not toward
the desire -- your back is. You have moved away from it. You have missed a moment in which
you could have gone deep down into your biological layer of being. You are clinging to the
social layer, which is the uppermost. Sex is deeper than
your SHASTRAS -- scriptures -- because it is biological. If all the shastras can be
destroyed -- and they can be destroyed, many times they have been -- your interpretation
will be lost. But sex will remain; it is deeper. Do not bring superficial things in. Just
consider the fact and move within, and feel what is happening to you. What happened to
particular rishis, to Mohammed and Mahavir, is irrelevant. What is happening to you this
very moment? This alive moment, what is happening to you? Consider it,
observe it. And then the second part... this is really beautiful. Shiva says, THEN,
SUDDENLY, QUIT IT. SUDDENLY --
remember. Do not say, "This is bad, so I am going to leave it. I am not going to move
with this idea, this desire. This is bad, this is sin, so I will stop it, I will suppress
it." Then a suppression will happen, but not a meditative state of mind. And
suppression is really creating by your own hands a deceived being and mind. Suppression is
psychological. You are disturbing the whole mechanism and suppressing energies which are
going to burst out any day. The energy is there, you have simply suppressed it. It has not
moved out, it has not moved in, you have simply suppressed it. It has simply moved
sideways. It will wait and it will become perverted, and perverted energy is the basic
problem with man. Psychological diseases are by-products of perverted energy. Then it will take such shapes, such forms, which are not even imaginable, and in those forms it will try again to be expressed. And when it is expressed in a perverted form, it leads you into a very, very deep anguish, because there is no satisfaction in any perverted form. And you cannot remain perverted, you have to express it. Suppression creates perversion. This sutra is not concerned with suppression. This sutra is not saying to control, this sutra is not saying to suppress. The sutra says,
SUDDENLY, QUIT IT. What to do? The
desire is there; you have considered. If you have considered it, it will not be difficult;
the second part will be easy. If you have not considered it, look at your mind. Your mind
will be thinking, "This is good. If we can quit sexual desire suddenly, this is
beautiful." You would like to do it, but your liking is not the question. Your liking
may not be your liking, but just the society's. Your liking may not be your own
consideration, but just tradition. First consider, do not create any liking or disliking.
Just consider, and then the second part becomes easy -- you can quit the desire. How to quit it?
When you have considered a thing totally, it is very easy; it is as easy as dropping this
paper from my hand. QUIT IT... What will happen? A desire is there. You have not
suppressed it and it is moving out, it is coming up; it has stirred your whole being.
Really, when you consider a desire without interpretation your whole being will become a
desire. When sex is there
and if you are not against it or for it, if you have no mind about it, then just by
looking at the desire, your whole being will be involved in it. A single sex desire will
become a flame. Your whole being will be concentrated in the flame, as if you have totally
become sexual. It will not only be at the sex center, it will spread all over the body.
Every fiber of your body will be trembling. The passion will have become a flame. Now,
quit it. Don't fight with it, simply say, "I quit it." One of my friends
was with me for many years. He was a constant chain smoker, and he tried and tried, as
smokers do, not to smoke. One day, suddenly in the morning, he would decide, "Now I
am not going to smoke," and by the evening he would be smoking again. And he would
feel guilty and he would defend it, and then for a few days he would not gather courage
again to decide not to smoke. Then he would forget what happened. Then one day, again he
would say, "Now I am not going to smoke," and I would just laugh because this
had happened so many times. Then he himself became fed up with the whole thing -- with
this smoking and then deciding not to smoke, and this constant vicious circle. He wondered what to
do. He asked me what to do, so I told him, "Do not be against smoking -- that is the
first thing to do. Smoke, and be with it. For seven days do not be against it; do this
thing." He said, "What
are you telling me? I have been against it, and even then I could not leave it, and you
are saying not to be against it. Then there is no possibility of leaving it." So I told him,
"You have tried with the inimical attitude and you have been a failure. Now try the
other -- the friendly attitude. Do not be against it for seven days." Immediately he
said, "Then will I be able to leave it?" So I told him,
"Then again... you are still inimical toward it. Do not think about leaving it at
all. How can one think about leaving a friend? For seven days just forget it. Remain with
it, cooperate with it, smoke as deeply as possible, as lovingly as possible. When you are
smoking, just forget everything; become the smoking. Be totally at ease with it, in deep
communion with it. For seven days, smoke as much as you like and forget about leaving
it." These seven days
became a consideration. He could look at the fact of smoking. He was not against it, so
now he could face it. When you are against something, or someone, you cannot face it. The
very being against becomes a barrier. You cannot consider... How can you consider an
enemy? You cannot look at him, you cannot look into his eyes; it is difficult to face him.
You can look deeply only into the eyes of one you love; then you penetrate deep. Otherwise
eyes can never meet. So he looked into
the fact deeply. For seven days he considered it. He was not against, so the energy was
there, the mind was there, and it became a meditation. He had to cooperate with it; he had
to become the smoker. After seven days he forgot to tell me. I was waiting for him to say,
"Now the seven days have ended, so now how can I leave it?" He forgot completely
about the seven days. Three weeks passed and then I asked him, "Have you forgotten
completely?" He said, "The
experience has been so beautiful, I do not want to think about anything else now. It is
beautiful, and for the first time I am not struggling with the fact. I am just feeling
what is happening to me." Then I told him,
"Whenever you feel the urge to smoke, simply quit." He didn't ask me how to quit
it, he had simply considered the whole thing and the whole thing became so childish, and
there was no struggle. So I said, "When you feel again the urge to smoke, consider
it, look at it, and leave it. Take the cigarette in your hand, stop for a moment, then
leave the cigarette. Let it drop, and as the cigarette drops let the urge also drop
inside." He didn't ask me how to do it, because consideration makes one capable -- you can do it. And if you cannot do it, remember, you have not considered the fact. Then you were against it, all the time thinking how to leave it. Then you cannot quit it. When suddenly the urge is there and you quit it, the whole energy takes a jump inward. The technique is the same, only the dimensions differ: WHEN SOME DESIRE
COMES, CONSIDER IT. THEN, SUDDENLY, QUIT IT. Third: ROAM ABOUT UNTIL EXHAUSTED AND
THEN, DROPPING TO THE GROUND, IN THIS DROPPING BE WHOLE. The same! This technique is the same. ROAM ABOUT UNTIL EXHAUSTED. Just run in a
circle. Jump, dance, and run again until you are exhausted -- until you feel that now not
a single step more can be taken. But you will have to understand that your mind will say
that now you are completely exhausted. Do not pay any attention to the mind. Go on
running, dancing, jumping. Go on! Do not pay any attention. The mind will say that now you
are exhausted, now you cannot go on any more. Continue until you feel -- not think, until
you feel -- that the whole body is tired, that "A single step more has become
impossible, and if I move I will fall down." When you feel that you are falling down and now you cannot move, that the body has become heavy and tired and completely exhausted, THEN, DROPPING TO THE GROUND, IN THIS DROPPING BE WHOLE. Then drop!
Remember, be so exhausted that dropping happens of itself. If you continue, you will drop.
The point has come -- you are just on the verge of dropping. Then, the sutra says, drop,
and IN THIS DROPPING BE WHOLE. That is the central
point in the technique: when you are dropping, be whole. What is meant? Do not drop just
according to the mind -- that is one thing. Do not plan it; do not try to sit, do not try
to lie down. Drop as a whole, as if the whole body is one and it has dropped. And you are
not dropping it, because if you are dropping it then you have two parts: you who is
dropping it and the body which has been dropped. Then you are not whole. Then you are
fragmentary, divided. Drop it as a whole; drop yourself totally. And remember, drop! Do
not arrange it. Fall down dead. IN THIS DROPPING BE WHOLE. If you can drop in this way,
you will feel for the first time your whole being, your wholeness. You will feel for the
first time your center -- not divided, but one, unitary. How can it happen?
The body has three layers of energy. One is for day-to-day affairs, which is very easily
exhausted. It is just for routine work. The second is for emergency affairs; it is a
deeper layer. When you are in an emergency, only then is it used. And the third is the
cosmic energy, which is infinite. The first can be easily exhausted. If I say to you to
run, you will take three or four rounds and you will say, "I am feeling tired."
Really, you are not feeling tired -- the first layer is exhausted. In the morning it will
not be so easily exhausted; in the evening it will be exhausted very easily because the
whole day you have been using it. Now it needs repair; you will need a deep sleep. From
the cosmic reservoir it can again get energy enough to work. This is the first layer. If I tell you to
run just now, you will say, "I am feeling sleepy, I cannot run." And then
someone comes and says, "Your house is on fire." Suddenly the sleepiness has
gone. There is no tiredness, you feel fresh; you start running. What has happened so
suddenly? You were tired, and the emergency has made you connected with the second layer
of energy, so you are fresh again. This is the second layer. In this technique, the second
layer has to be exhausted. The first layer is exhausted very easily. Continue. You will
feel tired, but continue. And within a few moments a new surge of energy will come, and
you will feel again renewed and there will be no tiredness. So many people come
to me and they say, "When we are in a meditation camp, it seems miraculous that we
can do this much. In the morning, for one hour meditating actively, chaotically, going
completely mad. And then in the afternoon we do an hour, and then in the night also. Three
times a day we can go on meditating chaotically." Many have said that they feel that
this is impossible, that they cannot continue and they will be dead tired, and the next
day it will be impossible to move any limb of the body. But no one gets tired. Three
sessions every day, doing such exertions, and no one is tired. Why? Because they are in
contact with the second layer of energy. But if you are
doing it alone -- go to a hill and do it alone -- you will become tired. When the first
layer is finished you will feel, "Now I am tired." But in a big group of five
hundred people doing meditation, you feel, "No one is tired, so I should continue a
little more." And everyone is thinking the same: "No one is tired, so I should
continue a little more. If everyone is fresh and doing, why should I feel tired?" That group feeling
gives you an impetus, and soon you reach the second layer. And the second layer is very
big -- an emergency layer. When the emergency layer is also tired, finished, only then are
you in contact with the cosmic, the source, the infinite. That is the right
moment -- the moment when you need courage. A little courage, and you will penetrate the
third, the deepest, infinite layer. This technique helps you very easily to fall into that cosmic ocean of energy: ROAM ABOUT UNTIL EXHAUSTED AND THEN, DROPPING TO THE GROUND, IN THIS DROPPING BE WHOLE. And when you drop
to the ground totally, for the first time you will be whole, unitary, one. There will be
no fragments, no divisions. The mind with its divisions will disappear, and the being that
is undivided, indivisible, will appear for the first time. |
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